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Adoption
Adoption is often quickly dismissed as an option for an unexpected pregnancy. A very common response to adoption is “I could never do that.” We understand this reaction; adoption is not an easy choice. Allowing another person or couple to raise your child as their own is a difficult decision to make.
Women who choose to place for adoption do so for several reasons: to provide the best opportunities for their child; to give another couple who may not be able to have children naturally the chance to parent; or because they do not want to have an abortion. Adoption is an option to consider if you are financially, emotionally, or otherwise unable to raise a child at this time.
There can be a lot of misconceptions about adoption. If you think adoption may be an option you would consider, it is crucial to gather all the facts and information.
Adoptions may be public or private. Public adoptions are facilitated by a branch of a province’s social services program, such as the Department of Youth Protection (DYP). Private adoptions are arranged within your own family and are facilitated by the family court. In the case of public adoptions, birth parents cannot choose who will adopt their child. However, they may make requests regarding the adoptive family, and the DYP workers will do their best to facilitate a good match. Adoptive parents go through a significant screening process before adopting. To learn more about becoming an adoptive parent, the Québec government's website is a good place to start.
In Quebec, communication agreements with the adoptive family can facilitate openness between you and your child. For example, you can choose to have contact with the adoptive family, and ongoing communication with your child can include pictures, phone calls, texts, and visits. Alternatively, you might have limited contact with the adoptive family, with most communication handled by an adoption worker. You also can decide to have no contact and only non-identifying information is shared with the adoptive family.
The adoption process is different in Quebec than in other places in Canada.
Planning and Timelines
The decision to place for adoption can be made at any time during your pregnancy or even after your baby is born. However, an adoption agreement can only be signed after the baby's birth. Also, birth parents have 30 days after signing an adoption agreement to change their mind.
It can be helpful to talk with the DYP. They can provide you with accurate information and discuss options based on your situation. Their job is not to talk you into adoption but to provide education and support, no matter what you decide. There is no cost for a meeting and you are under no obligation. An Options support worker can accompany you to a meeting with the DYP, if you so choose.
Even if adoption is the right choice for you, planning an adoption for your child can be emotionally difficult. There is a unique grieving process involved. Therefore, it’s important to have support throughout the entire adoption journey. Family and friends can be a good source of support, but counseling provided by DYP or the support offered at a pregnancy care centre can also be beneficial.
Accessing post-adoption support can help you move forward positively and encourage you to pursue your goals.
Our team is available to provide information about the adoption process in Québec and support you in navigating it, so you never have to be alone. We can be there before, during, and after the adoption process. Just like abortion and parenting, choosing adoption involves grief that deserves to be processed in a safe and caring environment.